Sad, Confused....devastated.

Josh and I broke up on Monday, and it blows. We weren't getting along very good, and so when I got home Monday morning I asked him what he was going to do to be happy within himself, not including me, because if he can't find inner happiness the relationship will suffer. SO one thing led to another, and he told me he's been doing drugs for two months behind my back. I got up, told him to pack his shit and leave, and then I left. I went and got Kristin and we came back home after he left to pack his stuff. I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that he would do something like that, knowing it's essentialy my whole life. Work and personal life revolve around recovery for me and he knew that. and to make matters worse, he got some of pills off Nate!!!! I was really pissed about that at first, but I know that it isn't Nates fault, Josh should of never asked him.
So now there is no trust. I was one hundred percent faithful, and never decieved him. I am heartbroken, and don't know what to do with that. It sucks sitting in this room, with NOTHING but a couch and a little TV, sleeping in HIS bed, until he comes and gets it. It was scary knowing that for two months he was bringing my drug of choice into my parents house, regardless if he was using them here or not. If I was to find those when I was having a bad day, that could of been the end of my own recovery.

I've been praying for him. and for those of you who know me well, you know that that is a big thing for me. I pray that he will realize he has an addiction, get help, find happiness, and be the great person I know he is. I ask that who ever reads this also prays for him, because he's an addic that is suffering, and he needs to realize the powerlessness over his addiction.